In the wake of the FA Premier League's announcement that it is considering an attempt to generate additional
interest and revenue by playing an extra round of fixtures overseas; ASIB has learnt that football leagues local to our area
are set to follow suit with their own radical plans to increase the popularity of the game.
The outrageous draft proposals currently include -
- A pre-season draw to determine the extra fixtures. Amazingly, it is proposed that this will include
all the local leagues from under 7 to semi professional.
- Team captains being required to roll a dice before kick off to determine the number of points available
for a win and a draw.
- Fixtures to be played in surrounding counties rather than Gloucestershire with the laws of the game
adapted to appeal to the local population.
The dramatic impact of these changes will be witnessed most in the fixtures drawn to be played in Wales,
where in order to generate maximum interest amongst the indigenous population, teams will be required to field 15 players
on each side and play with an egg shaped ball. The rule changes will also mean that players will have to carry the ball downfield
and place it on the floor over the goal line. Sides from certain areas covered by the leagues are understood to be especially
angry with the proposals because they will have to clean up their style of play considerably and will also be required to
address the referee as "Sir" rather than the traditional "oi ya c*nt".
